Feel My Shame
by GothPhantom
Summary: Her heart had been broken in two, one half belonging to the prince of her dreams, and the other half belonging to her best friend. Gelphie. With hints of GlindaxFiyero and ElphabaxFiyero. Three shot.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: No, I don't own Wicked. Hi Gregory!**

**A/N: Hello it's me again. I still have drama going on but forget it. Hehehe. So this is part one of a trilogy I'm recreating. Now, as some of you know, I wrote my very first Wicked one shot ages ago, and today i was rereading it and thinking how terrible it was. So I decided to rewrite it, make it longer, clearer, and Gelphier. Hehe. I really hope you guys like this one, I'm proud of how this turned out. And now enjoy...**

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Glinda The Good sat stilly on the edge of her bed and let the tears flow down her cheeks. Her makeup had been smeared for hours, her dress wrinkled, and her eyes unable to see clearly. Her heart had been broken in two, one half belonging to the prince of her dreams, and the other half belonging to her best friend. 

Of course, together, they made one heart whole. But it had not been Glinda's. Elphaba and Fiyero, the only people she could actually love and feel safe around, betrayed her. They ran off together, happy, in love, and forgetting that the blonde had ever existed. She was only there for support of everything that her true love and friend were against.

Thinking on her green friend instilled greater an ache of pain and regret than when she thought about the man of her dreams. The fact that they once despised each other seemed so far away to the blonde, even though it had only been a few weeks ago. But so much had happened between the two, Glinda was surprised how she went through it all smiling.

Of course Glinda had been emotionally destroyed when she found out about the two lovers. Betrayal was something that Glinda The Good had never expected in her life, seeing as she was the perfect girl of the perfect family in a perfect world.

Or at least, that's how she'd grown up to feel.

Glinda's head snapped up as she heard something hit into her wardrobe, which was across the room. She jumped for a moment, but decided to ignore it, finding it pointless to even bother with the little noises. The small woman held back a sob as she laid her head on the pillow inches away from her.

Glinda thought for a moment about Elphaba, popping out and saying something smart and sarcastic, rude and hating. But she knew Elphaba wouldn't appear. Her Elphie wasn't stupid enough to reveal herself in front of a betrayer.

_Her_ Elphie?

Glinda didn't care where the word came from, because for some reason, it set right with her heart. The blonde was in no mood to question any emotions that came from inside her, even though most of them seemed to rip her slowly apart.

Glinda's hatred of herself couldn't have been stronger. She lied, told people to kill her Elphie, and worst, she told Morrible Elphaba's weakness.

Nessarose.

The blonde's heart twisted in away unknown when the name ran across her mind. She knew Nessa, The Wicked Witch of the East, was going to die. And it was all her fault. The tragically beautiful girl that looked up to her was going to die, and all because Glinda was to hurt to care about her consequences.

The Good Witch let tears slide down her cheek as she buried her head into her pillow. She was still in her dress, it settling perfectly with her shape on the bed. Her tears were non stopping, and the pain that filled her heart was becoming unbearable.

She suddenly heard the guards stomping outside, tapping on her door, and asking if she was asleep. The door started to creak open, and Glinda closed her wet eyes tightly. The room seemed warm, the air tense, and Glinda's breathing barely heard.

Even though the guard walked away quietly, and even though Glinda was still awake, her nightmare seemed it was never going to end.

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	2. Chapter 2

**Discliamer: (Waves towards Gregory) I wish I owned Wicked.**

**A/N: Hello, I finished this the same night I wrote it. Lol. By the way, I forgot to write the name of which story I'm re-writing, it was A Best Friend Hug. Haha. I like this one a lot more, and expect the last chapter really soon. Also, this is taken place between As Long As You're Mine and The Cornfield scene. So it's musical verse. Oh, and for Cardboard, the Guard is looking after her...lol...hope you enjoy!**

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Elphaba slide against the wall as her heart pounded in her ears. She had run from Fiyero, thinking she heard her sister's cries, when she found herself coming here. 

To Glinda the Good's castle.

Elphaba could see out the corner of her eye the blonde, sitting up and slouching slightly, the tears crashing down around Elphaba's heart. She couldn't believe she was causing her best friend this much pain, when mostly everything Fiyero said wasn't true.

He made it sound as though they were having an affair. Elphaba loved Fiyero, of course, but she never had an affair with the man. She even felt wrong kissing him because something in her gut stabbed her when the blonde entered her mind. For some reason, whenever she saw Glinda standing in the light, finally fulfilling her dream, she knew, no matter how hard she tried, she wasn't happy.

And it was all the green girl's fault.

If she hadn't been so stubborn with the Wizard, none of this pain would be flowing through her love now. Elphaba knew she loved Glinda, no matter how many times she tried to reassure herself she loved the prince, she knew Glinda held a bigger part in her heart.

The green Witch silently took a breathe in, and gazed at her blonde friend. She felt the shame rise within her, everything she had ever tried to do to help, hurt the most important person to her. Elphaba felt a lump form in her throat, and she lost her balance- the Witch hit into the furniture nearest her; what it was couldn't be told in the dark. It made a soft thump, and Elphaba silently cursed herself. She saw the blonde's head shoot up, and glanced around at where Elphie was.

Elphaba stopped breathing. She crouched down low, keeping her eyes open, needing to see her love's eyes. Even if the way they looked caused her pain.

Elphaba moved slightly over so she could see the blonde clearly, and saw her face tumble to the pillow. The green girl had to blink back tears seeing her friend like this, and to her surprise, she heard her name cry from the blonde's mouth.

The girl found it difficult to breathe in that moment. She was causing her friend so much pain that she was crying out her name, and knowing no one would answer her.

Elphaba took another silent breathe, driving herself insane for not jumping up and hugging the damn girl. They were suppose to be best friends…but Elphaba knew she ruined that.

She heard feet pounding and the Witch knew she had to sink lower into the depths of the shadows. Glinda suddenly threw herself in a different position, and looked extremely comfortable. Elphaba had seen this act before; The blonde pulled it all the time at Shiz.

And then the Guard came in ever so quietly, peeking his head and looking at the Good Witch of Oz. The Wicked Witch, or so she was called, saw Glinda's eyes open with tears, not bothering to close them off from the world. He heard him mumble something about a Wicked Witch, and softly shut the door.

Elphaba took a shaky breathe and stood up. She, still hidden in the darkness, was not seen by her blonde friend, the girl who she always loved more than life.

The green girl paused for a moment before closing her eyes, and taking a step out of the shadows.

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	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: Gregory's still standing there. With the rights of Wicked in his hand. **

**A/N: Yay! Last chapter, long and angsty. It's really strange I'm writing angst at all 'cuz I've been unusually happy lately. I don't feel like writing a long A/N today. Lol. I will say that it gets really sad, and somewhat not Gelphie near the end. It's confusing, you'll have to read. :) Hope you all enjoy!**

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Glinda squeezed her eyes shut before letting out a depressing sigh and stood up. The moonlight was seeping into her room, and she looked upward slowly. Her eyes were glancing around for a moment, when suddenly, she saw a black blob step out from the shadows. 

Glinda was about to yell when the object took two strides to attack her by covering her mouth. The blonde almost started to scream with muffled cries, but then she looked at her capturer.

She recognized the eyes, those big brown eyes she'd fallen for. They were hinted with fear, desperation, hurt, love, and most of all, sadness.

Elphaba Thropp lowered her hand off the Good With slowly, hesitation filling her head. She knew this was a bad idea. She was suppose to see her sister, for Oz sake, but why did she come to see the blonde?

The blonde scanned the Witch for a moment, before uttering the one word her heart had wanted to say forever. "…Elphie?"

The green girl that stood before her was shaking tremendously, and Glinda couldn't help but slowly raise her hand and stroke the green cheek. The blonde shivered for a moment as a strange feeling wrapped around her heart. She blinked back tears and brought both hands to hold the green face. "Oh, Elphie."

Elphaba wrapped her arms around the blonde's waist, and Glinda automatically lowered her hands to wrap them around The Witch's neck. The blonde nuzzled her face into Elphaba's neck, and breathed with slight difficulty.

If the green Witch wasn't sure that this was real, she'd probably be beating herself to wake up. But since she could feel the blonde's heart beating with her own, she knew it was real.

As she slowly loosed the embrace, Elphaba looked deep into the blonde's eyes. "Why are you here?" Glinda whispered, holding onto the green hand.

Elphaba looked at the light pink hand that was mixed with her green one. The blended so well, the fingers laced together in perfect harmony. Wicked and Good combined to one friendship, one love, one life.

"I wanted to see you," Elphaba responded softly, he words flowing out naturally.

"But you shouldn't be here, Elphie…" Glinda felt the words as if they were curses seeping from her mouth. She didn't want Elphaba to leave. She never wanted Elphaba to leave again.

"I don't care," Elphaba said strongly but quietly, squeezing the blonde's hand. "I couldn't stand the thought of you crying."

Glinda became silent. "I can't stand you crying. The thought is painful enough, seeing it for myself is worse, and knowing I'm the one who caused it is terrible."

Glinda took a shaky breathe before a sob escaped her throat. "I cry every night because I'm afraid something is going to happen to you."

The brunette blinked before her eyes softened. "You shouldn't worry about-"

"Don't say that," Glinda said suddenly, fiercely. "Don't ever say I shouldn't worry about my best friend."

Now it was Elphaba's turn to become silent. "I care about you more than I thought I did, Elphaba. I can't help it but worry and be scared when I never see you."

The green girl gazed into the pale blue eyes that shined with tears in the moonlight. "Glinda, I'm so sorry."

Glinda blinked. "About what?"

Elphaba stared hard at the floor before muttering one word. "Fiyero."

In the next moment, tension flowed into the room. It felt hot, uncomfortable, and fearful.

Glinda laughed softly. "Fiyero…"

The brunette brought her eyes to match the blonde's gaze. "I'm so sorry…"

"I know you are." The small girl said, tossing her hair ever so slightly. And with those few words the room was filled with a different emotion. Not tension, not fear, not even depression.

Now it was filled with regret.

Elphaba took a rather large and unnecessary step back from the blonde. Glinda, suddenly losing the body heat, became cold and scared. Was her best friend going to leave her?

"Elphie, no, don't leave," Glinda suddenly found herself pleading, her eyes threatening to spill with tears, her heart threatening to break.

The green girl stared at her. "Glinda, I'm ashamed of myself for doing this to you."

The blonde stepped closer and held Elphaba closer than a friend would. Her face, only inches away from Elphaba's, was lost.

"I'm ashamed for not doing this sooner."

Glinda pressed her lips against Elphaba's gently, closing her eyes and feeling relief seep through her soul.

Elphaba felt her heart summersault as the blonde placed her lips on hers. Elphaba didn't pull back nor did she want to, but she didn't return the kiss right away either. After a moment of recollecting her thoughts, the green girl pressed back, something in her heart that felt wrong before turning right.

Even if it lasted a moment, neither noticed. Glinda pulled away after a moment, suddenly realizing what had just happened, and fear was written across her face.

"Oh, Elphie," she said fearfully, taking a small step back and putting her hands, balled up in fists, to her mouth. "You must think terribly-"

"Don't say that," Elphaba countered, placing her words carefully to quote the blonde from earlier. "Don't say that I would ever think terribly of you."

Glinda became quiet at the brunette's choice of words. _She always had a way with words,_ the blonde thought, but her heart was still jumping out of place. "I love you."

The words lingered in the room for a moment, pounding in each others heads before realizing who said the three words.

Their voices blended together and formed one, sounding like something only the two could ever create. The three words, falling from both mouths, blended, forming a strange feeling in both of their hearts.

No words needed to be said as Elphaba placed her lips on Glinda's for a moment again, reliving the sensation she had felt moments ago. But this time, Glinda pulled back sooner, feeling guilty for something she knew Elphaba would never forgive her for. But she had to tell her.

"What is it?" Elphaba asked, fear hinting in her tone.

"Elphaba…I have to be honest with you…" Glinda said slowly, unsure of exactly how to say it.

"What is it?" The green girl repeated, the fear becoming more noticeable.

"I hope you said goodbye to your sister." Glinda blurted out, boldly yet softly, her eyes becoming wide with how she said the damn sentence.

Elphaba's eyes went wide as she tilted her head. "I didn't. We got into an argument. Why?"

Glinda's eyes filled with tears as she looked down at the green hand. "Elphaba, Nessa's…Nessa's…" How was she to break it to the girl? Things weren't going quiet Elphaba's way, how was the blonde suppose to tell her that her sister was dead?

"What is it, Glinda?" Elphaba pressed, holding onto the blonde's hand.

"Nessa's…Nessa's dead."

A nasty, unwanted, unneeded, silence filled the room. Glinda could feel Elphaba's hand go stiff and saw her face fall. The blonde could almost feel the green girls heart drop.

Elphaba's head started to spin at those words. She had heard her sister's cries, Fiyero was wrong. Why did she have to storm off? Why didn't she just stay there with her little sister while she could? It was all her fault, as was everything else…

"And, Elphaba," Glinda hated herself for finally telling the green girl the truth. "It's my fault."

Elphaba was taken aback by that. "How on earth could it be your fault? I was the one who left Nessa alone, I should've been there for her instead of storming off on her."

Glinda felt her heart twist when the thought of Elphaba blaming herself for this came in. That was impossible.

"No, Elphaba, listen." Glinda closed her eyes, knowing that something was going to go wrong in a moment. "I told Morrible that killing your sister was a way to get you where they wanted."

Elphaba stared at the blonde before dropping her hand completely and turning away. The blonde felt shame rise in her throat before attempting to turn the girl around.

But that didn't work.

Elphaba yanked her arm away and took a shaky breathe. Why didn't she see it before? It seemed so obvious now that she knew.

"Elphaba, I'm so sorry." Glinda said softly, tears leaking from her eyes.

The brunette remained quiet, suddenly grabbing her broom and heading towards the window. Glinda's eyes went wide as she scurried over to her and held her tightly.

"Please don't leave." Elphaba said nothing. "Elphaba, please. I don't want to lose you again." Again silence. "I love you to much to lose you again."

Elphaba finally made eye contact with the blonde before staring her with harsh eyes. "Let me go, Glinda." She barked, a lump forming in her throat from being so cold, her heart breaking from the loss of her sister.

"Elphaba-"

The green Witch snapped her arm away from the blonde's tender hold. Glinda felt tears spill over her cheeks and fall to the floor, watching the only person she really loved tear away from her.

The green Witch stood at the window sill, broom in hand, hesitating to fly out the window and leave the poor girl. But she knew she had to, she had to make sure that what her love said as true.

"I love you, Elphie." Glinda's words tied a knot around Elphaba's heart and was almost tugging it to stay with her. But Elphaba was stronger than that.

"I'm sorry."

And in the next moment, the black dress was out the window, into the night's sky, levitating off the ground. Glinda's heart broke in two and shattered around her. She ran over to the window for any trace, and speck, any sight of the green girl.

But there was nothing.

Glinda stared as her vision got blurry. She felt herself start to lose balance and her head was spinning.

"Elphaba, I love you." Glinda whispered, before she fell and her world went dark.

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